teamzaylor

Title: THE BODYGUARD
Chapter: 23 - Christine (The first scar of guilt)
Rating: Nc-17
POV: Blade (Zac)
Chapter Overview: Link

About the Story: The death of their parents broke Taylor and Zac apart. Each of them went his own way of life, Taylor became a famous superstar and never thought that his profession would bring his life in danger someday. Blade (Zac) buried the past and lived his life contentedly in his dark and dirty world as a pimp. Because of some unexpected circumstances Blade got hired as Taylor's bodyguard and the brothers saw each other for the first time after almost a decade. How will they overcome the shadows of the past?

Excerpt: Violence is so terribly fast . . . the most perverted thing about the movies is the way they portray it in slow motion, allowing it to be something sensuous . . . the viewers’ lips slightly wet as the scene plays out. In real life, Violence is nothing like that. It is lightning fast, chaotic, and totally intangible.

Authors Notes: Chapter 23 is another Flashback / Dream Chapter about Santiago (Red) and Blade's Army experiences. Thanks for reading and commenting. Chapter 24 will be updated in the following week.

PS.: Please use the Chapter Overview or our inserted Links which will forward you to the next Chapter in the right order.

previous Chapter 22 next Chapter 24

Blade:

I was twenty one years old when I had to kill someone for the very first time. Red & I were sent to Afghanistan on a secret mission, he had already been on other missions before, while for me on the other hand, it was my first time.

My education helped me to be prepared for the upcoming situations of which I already knew would come sooner or later, but to experience killing someone in real life is a totally different story compared to every training I had. No training could really prepare you for that.

Violence is so terribly fast . . . the most perverted thing about the movies is the way they portray it in slow motion, allowing it to be something sensuous . . . the viewers’ lips slightly wet as the scene plays out. In real life, Violence is nothing like that. It is lightning fast, chaotic, and totally intangible.

If you couldn't deal with that, you’d be a dead meat before you could say Jack Robinson. I couldn’t be scared, I couldn’t allow myself to regret it... Besides, I didn't belong to the mercenary force anymore since I became a soldier. I was bound to the Army.

No matter how hard the upcoming tasks would be, I had to just simply forget about what I had done and move on. I had nothing to lose, which was one of the best features a soldier could have. But deep down, it felt like eating a human being. If you were thinking how gross it sounds, I was feeling the same thing, but I just had to swallow it. Coz I knew that deep down, it wouldn’t be the first and last time that I’d do it, I knew that there would be many more times to come.

It was the third week for us in Afghanistan when Red and me had arrested a guy in order to get information from him about his secret principal. But fortunately or unfortunately, he was raping a girl when we got into his condo unit. He was caught off guard so it went very easy for us to get him.

The girl's name was Christine, she had became his sex slave three days ago. She told us that she was walking on her way home when he kidnapped her. The girl looked totally harassed, her eyes were filled of fear, she was only seventeen for Christ’s sake! She had bruises all over her face and when we tried lifting her from the bed, she couldn’t even stand without a support anymore. So we had to use carrier to bring her to the medics. What the sad part was that, we learned that it wasn't even the first time the fucking culprit did that. It appeared that, he was working for someone in the human trafficking business whom we were trying hard to find.

Red and me had that human scum tied to a chair before we began with our interrogation. Showing weakness was incongruous at every time on our mission, especially in situations like that so I made sure to look calm and composed.

“You’ll fucking answer all of my questions, or else I’m going to cut your fingers one by fucking one.” Red bellowed in the face of the fucking scumbag.

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He then turned his head to my direction. He didn't say anything, but his eyes were telling me, ‘I could handle it’. I stood in front of the door, attentively watching Red's actions. I crossed my arms to my chest and waited. The gang member wasn’t surprised to that though, he just sat calmly, not even bothered that he was tied tightly on the chair and was about to get tortured. Well, if he would continue struggling against us.

“You’re not getting anything from me.” He spat to Red’s face in Chinese accent. Through the small bulb in the middle of the room I could see some blood coming out from his mouth.

He received one nice blow in his stomach because of that. If he’d continue answering like that to Red, he’d end up losing all of his fingers. I had already seen a few suspects under interrogation, so I knew how the procedure would be, but it was the first time for me to lead one independently.

I knew Santiago very well. Not that I don’t trust him, but I knew that he was losing his patience, and so was I. I couldn’t blame him. All of us were lack of sleep and we were also hungry. We got food, yes, but we didn’t get time to relax and to eat at peace. So we mostly end up eating just whenever we got the chance. I also couldn’t remember the last time we took a bath. And lastly and most importantly, we ain’t got much time. We needed to gather all the information we could get as early as tonight before the big boss of this dirty slave trader gang discover what we just did to one of his center of operations.

“Tell me, where the hell your big boss is hiding?” Red tried again.

No answer.

That caused him another punch of course. I continued watching.

“Where is your son of a bitch, big fat bastard, coward shit of a boss?”

“Ri ni ge xian ren ban ban”, the guy answered defiantly instead.

A second later, I heard him shouting in pain.

“Ahhhhhh!” He stared hysterically on his thigh where Red’s knife was buried now.

"I understood what you just said. Your ancestors are more fucked up than ours for creating shameful human like you." Red didn't even blink, I knew he must be starving for food, but he never lost his concentration.

“I call the shots here, young man. Got it?”

Red twisted his wrist, inducing more pain to the bastard's thigh.

“Fuckin’ answer me!” he was still gripping the knife handle.

“I told you already, I’m not saying anything….” He answered tiredly, his voice now wasn’t proud anymore.

Red pulled the knife to his flesh then stabbed it again on his other thigh.

The scumbag screamed again in pain.

“You’re a damn fool. Me and my friend here are not here to waste time if you still didn't realize it!”

“You know what buddy, let me handle it.” I finally interjected, coz I knew it was about time to practice my own skills. Besides, we had wasted enough time already and I couldn't restrain myself anymore. So I walked over to them and pulled my own knife out of my trousers.

I gave Santiago a long glance and he knew I was ready for it. He knew that I needed my own sweet time with that human scum. Now, it was my fucking turn to scare the hell out of him!

“Fuck, Blade, I’ll go and get some food. This piece of shit only made me more hungry," was all he said to me before he pulled his knife out off the young Chinese man.

I had his trust. And I felt more confident to what I was about to do. He lightly slapped the face of the scumbag, “be a good boy, you are facing Blade, he has no mercy. Good luck.” Then he walked out.

When Red's steps were out of hearing, I could only hear the sound of the heavy breathing of the sicko who was bound hand and foot. Both of us didn’t speak for a moment. I carefully studied him. He looked scared but determined at the same time. But there was no way he could be more determined than me. Especially not when I thought about Christine...

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the innocent seventeen year old girl who died on the way to the hospital just for a three day pleasure of a human scum like him.

I grabbed Red's stool and sat comfortably in front of him.

“You know what, I like using guns, but I also have a preference for sharp blades.” I gave him a glance, then I raised my knife.

“Don’t worry, I’m not gonna use it to hurt you.” I assured him before standing up. I went to the corner where my little collection of swords were located. I picked the two-handed one. I carefully pulled it out for a show.

“THIS is what I’m going to use.” I told him grinning.

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He looked frightened. Strike one!

“Seems that you don't realize you just fucked with the wrong white boy. But let me tell you something. You get three options.”

He just stared at me, waiting, obviously intimidated. I smiled to myself. Apparently, I was on the right way. I stared at him upfront.

“First, you’re gonna tell me the information I need, then I won’t kill you….” I paused, studying his reaction. His beaten mouth flinched, but didn't say a word.

“Second, I won’t force you to tell me anything and I’d just cut your head off so that my dog can eat your brain.”

Still no answer. I touched the blade of my sword, watched my own reflection on it as I waited for any sign of reaction. He was concentrating as he listened, swallowing his own blood and saliva.

“And third, I’ll torture you all night until you decide that you still want to live and see the sunrise tomorrow morning.”

I placed my sword on my lap horizontally and fixed my sunglasses.

“Your options are bullshit!” He said pathetically. Strike two!

I clenched my teeth. I wanted to kick his face and punch it repeatedly. Behind my calmed composure, there was a ranging anger. I never felt so violent in my 21 years of existence. My mind was trying its best to concentrate on the task at hand, but I couldn't erase the picture of a girl lying on a bed with wounds and swollen flesh and a gag in her mouth.

I closed my eyes and breathed in and breathed out. I rested my elbow on my knee and touched my chin in a relaxed manner. I needed to pretend that I was nothing but serious to get the information from him. Showing self-assurance was absolutely essential. “Yes, they are, but believe me, they are the only options you have.”

He said nothing. I stared at him for several minutes, giving him short time to think. He was breathing hard.

When I came to realize that he wouldn't say a fucking word, I knew that so much time had been already wasted. So I grabbed the handle of my sword and stood up.

“You know what, I’m tired and if I’m not getting anything from you I’d rather kill you, right the fuck now.” I positioned the edge of the sword on the side of his neck. I gave a little pressure on it, telling him that I wasn’t bluffing. He closed his eyes in resignation.

“Fuck you American! I’m not saying anything.” He whispered, as if he was just talking to himself.

“Tell me, aren’t you afraid to die? What will you get from hiding the information to us? Your boss is probably having so much fun right now while you’re about to die in my hands. Life’s not fair, isn’t it?” I pushed the blade of my sword on his neck some more, I saw it tearing a small portion of his skin.

He opened his eyes after that and subsequently I swung my sword to have more momentum.

“I’ll speak now! Please….! Please stop!!!!” He was frantic. If he wasn't tied up, he probably already jumped on his seat to let me know how desperate he was to stop me. It was hilarious to be honest. Now, that the sicko was in a reverse situation and was the one who got tortured, it turned out what a fucking pathetic coward he was. But part of the job was to hide my feelings, I composed myself and sat on the chair again.

Agitatedly, he finally gave the data I needed. As I took in all of the infos, I started thinking of how I should end this as Red entered our headquarters and headed towards us again.

"Blade, our team has found several corpses of young women in the back yard of that fucking piece of shit. So you know what you have to do with him."

I swallowed hardly audibly and my palms began to sweat. I immediately understood what he meant. Scaring someone to hell is one thing, but to kill someone is another. But there was no point of return anymore. I stood up again and brought my sword back to its place. I took my gun with silencer, turned around and went to the backside of the criminal. Slowly I raised my arm and aimed it against his occipital bone. A drop of sweat fell down from my temple as I unlocked the trigger and for a second I thought the gun would slide out of my sweaty palms. Red came closer to me, gave me a long glance and a nod.

"You are ready for it, Blade."

His whispering words echoed in my head.

I didn’t feel the need to look at the face of the bastard, I knew it was what he deserved. I ignored his please, all that I heard were the cries of the young girls that he tortured and raped. Their deaths shouldn't have been for nothing...

It was all I needed to shot. The man was dead on the spot. It didn’t make me feel good, but we couldn’t stand living in this world knowing that we let a heartless human being to keep breathing even though we had the chance to end his shameless life...

I moved my head to the side and looked up in Santiago's eyes searching for absolution. He took my scribbled written notes out of my hand and I shoved my gun back into my belt.

"I knew you’re ready for it," he said, laid his arm around my back and we walked out of the room together. He gave the notes about the secret prinicipal to Sergeant Major Riley on our way out.

“Shawn, clean up the mess inside the room.” He commanded to another team member as we walked back into the vestibule.

We sat down at a table where a few of our team mates were already eating ravenously the burgers Santiago had brought.

He immediately shoved a hamburger over to me.

"Here, you need to eat something." He commanded.

I couldn't eat anymore though. Even though everyone told me that the scumbag had received what he deserved, I didn't eat and speak for the two following days.

We had luck this time. A successful result was rare and everybody praised me and patted my back as if they wanted to congratulate me about my first commit a murder. It didn't feel right to me though, I couldn't even describe how it felt, but I knew that since that moment I wasn't the same person anymore.

The first scar of guilt had marked my soul which I would never be able to wash away anymore...

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Blade, hey Blade, wake up!"

I could still feel the metal of the gun in my sweaty palms when I opened my eyes... I needed a moment to realize where I was... Then I noticed Santiago standing next to me.

"You were talking while you’re asleep soldier, here drink this, it will help you calm down."

My eyes slowly adjusted to my surroundings and I saw that he held a glass with a weird looking content out to me.

"Yeah? Have I told you what kind of old geezer you are?" I groaned and sat up.

"No, actually you were singing chorus of praises about me," he retorted laughing and put the glass down on the table.

"What the fuck is this shit?" I frowned at him.

"Some sort of tea. It will help to calm your nerves."

"I'm not gonna drink this shit! Go away with that and tell Nathaniel to bring me something 'decent'!"

He sighed. "You should fucking drink this shit if you don't want to freak out sooner or later soldier!" He tried again louder with more intensity in his tone this time.

"Then give me some coke and I will be a good boy." I demanded unimpressed.

"Fuck no! What do you think what kind of person I am?!"

"Do you really want me to answer that question? You better have a seat in that case."

I couldn't avoid to smirk about that. Of course I knew that Santiago wouldn't give in and that it would end up with me drinking that shit but I couldn't help to drive him up the walls anyway. Teasing people had always been a part of me, regardless of whether they could deal with it or not. I've been a prankster ever since I could remember.

He stood there, obviously pissed off and I contemplated if I'd continue teasing him another round. Unfortunately, he already lost his patience.

"Fucking drink that shit now and stop being such a stubborn bastard!" He spat, then took his crutches and disappeared through the curtains.

I gave in. Probably the old bastard was right once again, surprise surprise!

A glance on the watch at the wall made me realize that it was about time to leave. Time to go back to the past, to everything where I didn't want to be. I sighed and fought awkwardly with the amount of protruding hair strands all over my face.

It seemed that my whole life was turning only around my fucking brother which pissed me off. When I drove away from Pasadena this early evening, actually I wanted to avoid to talk about Taylor to get him out of my mind for at least a few hours but I knew that Santiago would stick to his guns until I had told him about the latest happenings...

Well, at least he didn't probe too much which I appreciated. The last hours of sleep were necessary to regain a few of my nerves, even though the few hours were unfortunately elapsed much too quickly.

"Get your fucking ass up Blade, it's about time!" Santiago's voice pulled me out of my reluctantly self again.

I drank the rest of the disgusting shit he gave me and choked it down my throat. If it would help me to stay calm for the upcoming hours, it couldn't be that bad. I put the glass away, took my back pack from the floor and walked to the front area.

"Will you come for a visit tomorrow too?" He asked when I came out of his back room.

"I don't know yet." I shrugged.

"If you don't, give me a call at least."

I nodded and watched him for a short while, talking to one of his regular costumers.

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He had been my best friend since nine fucking years already. Taylor could never make up for what Santiago had done for me for those long years. I didn't want to go, but I had to. If I could choose my fate for once, I'd rather dream that fucking war nightmare over and over again instead of driving back to Taylor and the past. But this was not a dream, this was fucking reality.

And I had to face it like I always did. Maybe not only for Santiago, but also to prove myself that I am not like my older brother.

I'm a soldier and I would fight like I had learned to.

From now on my life wasn't mine anymore. I didn't know how professional Taylor's Stalker was and if he was better than me, but it became my task to take care of my brother and that's what I would do. To protect him with my own life which isn't worth a penny compared to Taylor's anyway.

If he'd die, thousands, maybe even millions of his fans would cry and not get over the fact that their famous idol of perfection died, while me on the other hand only Santiago and my dog would be left back. Which was nothing compared to my popular brother. My life was cursed either way. With Santiago's accident and my first encounter with Skye my soul was sold. I had no right to decide over my own life anymore. My life now belonged to my brother. I would die for him without hesitation if I had to. Maybe then he would finally realize what he had done to me. I wasn't afraid to die, my life was full of guilt and so was his. And if I should be the only one who should suffer through that fucking shit, then apparently it should be my fucking destiny.

With that, I gave Santiago a short nod as a farewell and made my fucking way out of his bar.