The Bodyguard - Chapter 37
Apr. 22nd, 2014 03:35 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
teamzaylor
Title: THE BODYGUARD
Chapter: 37
Rating: Nc-17
POV: Blade (Zac) / Taylor
Warnings: Language, Death, Crime
Chapter Overview: Link
About the Story: The death of their parents broke Taylor and Zac apart. Each of them went his own way of life, Taylor became a famous superstar and never thought that his profession would bring his life in danger someday. Blade (Zac) buried the past and lived his life contentedly in his dark and dirty world as a pimp. Because of some unexpected circumstances Blade got hired as Taylor's bodyguard and the brothers saw each other for the first time after almost a decade. Will they be able to overcome the shadows of the past?
Authors Notes: Update Chapter 37, more Updates very soon. Enjoy ♡
previous Chapter 36 next Chapter 38
Blade:
I hurried over to him, sat behind him and pulled him into a kneeling position from behind with his butt on my lap. Taylor was shaking uncontrollably, his breathings were fast and heavy. Despite my despise against him, I was here to make my fucking job so I had to calm him down. Quickly, I circled my arms around the small frame of his upper body, pulled his back closer against my chest and commanded him to breath deep and calmly. I put my hands around his cold, shaking fingers and pressed them in mine that they would stop shaking.
It was the weirdest moment we had so far.
But it made me realize that he was really scared about his life, even though he didn't admit it.
I held him close to me for several minutes until he finally calmed down and his shaking and wheezing slowly slackened and ceased.
He didn't say anything until he was calmed down. Instead of thanking me, he stood up after that, walked towards the bathroom and mumbled some words about feeling dirty and needing a shower.
Well, thanks again Taylor for another asskick!
I knew by myself that I was a fucking disgusting person. But Taylor managed it again that I also felt that way. Why the fuck did I even try my best in this job after all?
For Santiago, Blade. You're guilty for what you did to Santiago, so you have to go through this...
That's why I had to try anyway, there was no other way and no other means for me to do it. It was all I could do to soothe my own nerves somehow.
My anger was interrupted from a knock on the door, I shook my head and tried to not think about the guilt I felt. Sighing, I stood up and walked to the door to open it.
Lisa brought Bandito back with a plate of sandwiches and I told her to tell the girls to go out or to stay in their rooms for the next hour, hoping my diva brother would be finished in the bathroom in that interval so that we could leave the brothel unnoticed after breakfast.
After she was gone, I went over to the bathroom. I heard Taylor showering behind the door, so I spoke loud and clearly.
"You've got about 45 minutes before we have to leave so get ready, princess."
"I will be ready by then." He answered, trying to sound convincing.
"A likely story." I sarcastically told myself as I went over to my boss desk and sat down on the armchair behind it. As I ate my sandwich and drank my soda I spent the next half hour painting a picture of a big drake who ate up two pathetic figures which looked like Skye and Taylor.
But even that didn't make me feel better.
I longed so bad to wring Skye’s neck that very morning. He was the one to blame. I wouldn’t be in this fucked up state if it wasn’t because of him.
The reason why I saved Skye? I couldn't even remember on which drugs I must have been that night...
All my instinct told me was that I should knock the living shit out of him with my bare hands to get him finally off my back. And Taylor deserved the same treatment.
As the beauty queen finally came out of the bathroom 50 minutes later he looked distraught.
"What's the matter with you now?" I asked, already expecting another rejection, reproof or whatsoever.
"I... I shouldn't have watched the surveillance video. I had a really bad nightmare last night..." He confessed, his eyes focussing the floor.
"I told you that you were not in the condition to watch that shit. You shouldn't have watched it without my permission."
"Guess I overestimated myself..." He sheepishly explained.
"It's okay Taylor, that can happen. But it's good that you told me about that because I have to prevent that you'll to get more nightmares. From now on I'll keep an eye on your bedtime and not let you watch any violent shit anymore."
I was glad at this point that I wasn't the cause of his panic attack. Still, I knew Taylor shouldn't watch anything that gave him nightmares. His condition was in my hands.
Taylor stood there like in a dream state. "Have you heard and understood what I just said Taylor?" I frowned at him, noticing that he blushed beet red as he was trying to formulate his answer. His hesitant reaction showed that it couldn't be bad for him to have a dominant leader and protector in his perfect little princess life.
"Yes Blade, I understand. I won't watch such videos anymore. I definitely don't want to have such a nightmare again..." He stuttered bashfully like a child that did something wrong. Unfortunately, he didn't seem to realize that I as his bodyguard was responsible for him and his condition. Taylor built up problems about things which don't need to be a problem if he didn't let them to become one. Considering Taylor's shame, I don't believe it before I see it but my own opinion was like usual not relevant to him.
"Look Taylor, as a bodyguard I'm responsible for you and your condition. I have to make sure you won't get another panic attack because of a violent video. It's clear that you need constant supervision." If Taylor said that to me I guess he would even get praise about how caring he was. But if I said exactly the same to him, it was punishment and humiliation? Why should we get different treatment because of a two years age difference? We're fucking adults and not children anymore!
"Can we please talk about something else, now?" As expected Taylor chickened out and went over to the bed.
He deliberately turned his back to me so that I couldn't see his face anymore.
I sighed. Why are older siblings are so difficult? "Sooner or later we have to talk about this whole situation Taylor!"
"I'm not ready yet Blade. Please." He said quietly and began to pack his stuff into his bag neatly one after another.
"Here's a sandwich by the way." I nodded towards the plate on the table next to me but he didn't want to eat it, so I shared the rest with Bandito. I had no idea if Taylor declined it because of the evident mistrust between us or if he just didn't want to eat. I waited until he finished drinking out his soda, then brought him and Bandito out of my brothel and back to my car. At least we could take the elevator this time, which was necessary because of Bandito's injury. Taylor kept silent until we got in the car. I laid Bandito in a halfway comfortable position on the backseat, so that his leg wouldn't hurt him during the car drive.
"We can't drive back home yet," was the first thing Taylor said as I was about to start the engine. "The police is still investigating the house, they will need until the afternoon with the investigations until they're finished."
Fuck! That wasn't good news. I had hoped to be back as soon as possible to catch that fucking Freak who dared to hurt my dog. As he already visited the house twice, I was convinced he would come back to that place sooner or later.
I couldn't bring Bandito to Santiago already which meant that I had to cruise around aimlessly with Taylor until then.
I groaned.
If only I would have slept longer at least...
"I have to bring Bandito to a friend of mine later, but not before noon." I thought out loud, thinking about how I could kill the next two hours best as I came to know that Taylor already had made plans.
"Blade, I need to buy a black suit. The family of my wife will come to Pasadena today and I won't have the opportunity to get changed anymore before they will arrive on this afternoon. I have to wear some decent clothes when I meet them. I can't encounter them in jeans and T-shirt."
I didn't expect his sudden worries after he got so drunk last night that he couldn't stand straight anymore. For sure I could understand that he wanted to wear decent clothes for that meeting. Actually, it was even the first appropriate idea Taylor wanted to do about his wife's death. Finally.
The imagination to go shopping clothes bored the fuck out of me though. Now, I myself have been known to wear the same pair of torn, fraying jeans three times a week but that’s only because I’m severely lazy and mildly disgusting, not because I have nothing else to wear.
"Yeah fine. But I can't let Bandito too long alone in the car." I replied.
"I will try to make it fast. There is a boutique in the mall in the inner city where I can get a suit. Honestly, I feel worried about meeting them. I'm not sure if they blame me of what happened..."
His voice cracked as he was saying that. I had no choice but to hear it.
I didn't know what to respond coz I sensed that he was longing for some comfort which I just couldn't give him. He finally had a clue how to act accordingly about his wife's death, but he still only saw his own pain...
In hope that the moment would just pass us, I steered my car out of the downtown district.
Suddenly, I kind of felt paranoid that someone might be following us. Maybe it was because of all the whirlwind of emotions I had in the past few days, or maybe because of my dreams.
This part of the town had become my life since I left the Army and I knew how dangerous it could be even at day time. Especially when there’s a batshit crazy psycho fan stalking the famous superstar beside me, so I drove faster towards the inner city.
Taylor sighed loudly. As I glanced at him quickly I saw that he was looking outside watching the tropical landscapes.
His eyes had that empty look again, the same look he had last night when we were also driving in my car.
I knew the feeling of losing someone very well. I knew how hard to swallow the fact that you wouldn’t be with the person you loved. If Taylor knew back then how to act accordingly, I would surely feel sympathy for him.
I wasn’t a heartless human being like what I showed to him. Sadly, his actions showed me only one thing; that he still didn't realize that I was hurt too.
I released a harsh breath, thoughts about our past were disturbing my concentration again. I had a very important thing to do and to care about!
The psycho fan Twink Twink was probably out there planning his next visit, but his days were already counted. I'd try my best that he would pay for what he did to Bandito!
I repeatedly checked on the side view mirrors and started observing the cars behind us. Twink Twink or even Paparazzi might be all over us before I knew it if I wouldn’t be cautious.
The Inner City was full of huge signboards from different artists pronking at their massive buildings and Taylor was one of them. It needed only a short drive through this part of the town and a few glances around to recognize that he was someone like a god here.
Huge tour posters were hanging everywhere. We passed by some music shops which played Taylor's latest music videos in non-stop loop on their TV's in the window panes.
I was getting fucking paranoid by all those Taylor pictures everywhere!
He infuckted my life like a disease I couldn't get rid off anymore...
If his fans would experience to get treated the way like I was treated by him, maybe they'd change their minds about him. At least the smart ones.
When we finally arrived at the mall, I tried to find a sparsely populated place where I could park my car which was almost impossible at this part of the town but at least it was still early, so I hoped that most of his crazy admirers would still be at work, school or wherever the fucking fuck...
Good thing Bandito was sleeping on the backseat right now, I really didn't need to see more vomit for today..!
I went out of the car and opened the door for her highness as I gave the place another quick glance of appraisal.
“Get out now and make it fast!" I fixed my sunglasses and waited for Cinderella to come out.
I stopped him when he was about to come out though, coz I suddenly remembered something. It was better for him to wear sunglasses as well.
"You better put on your sunglasses." The shades would help to cover a bit of his famous face at least. Taylor nodded, reached for his bag and began to clear out his stuff. He had brought a two weeks survival set in his big purse. It was full of girly items and acessoires. There were three different cameras, his cellphone, a soft drink bottle, a cappucino can, his wallet, one packet of cigarettes and a red book. He had the same luxurious looking cell phone like Skye. On Taylor's cell phone case was a light pink Hello Kitty sticker. Typical! Those two pussycats were like fucking faggott sisters.
Then there were three books, one seemed to be a photo album, the second was a book about architecture and the third was a red leather book. As I noticed that book and its engraved ornate writing 'Journal' on the cover I was a little suprised. I knew that book. It was Taylor's diary which he already had used in his teenager days.
He tipped out more and more items, there was a another small transparent bag full of creams, deodorants and other shit. ell, he owned more care products than I bought in my whole life. What the fuck was he doing?
"The sunglasses are right on top of your head."
"Oh yeah. I totally forgot." He replied, slightly confused. If he wasn't such a cold-blooded bastard, his girly scattiness could have been kind of adorable.
Silently, he put his stuff back in his bag and hung it around his shoulder, but still hesitated to climb out and looked bemused around the area instead. His eyes focussed the sky and followed the clouds which drifted past, his look was dreamy and distant. Apparently, the blue-eyed dreamer was out of touch with the real world once again.
He was such a god damn princess all the fucking time. Groaning, I snapped my fingers in Sleeping Beauty's precious face to pull her out of her daydreams.
"Hurry now princess. We don't have all day."
What the fuck is he waiting for? Red fucking carpet?
Finally, he got out of the car. As we went into the mall my eyes immediately caught attention of the big Game center on the left side.
Holy Fuckness! The Warhammer 40.000 game for PS3 was already released! Damn! Damn! Why did I have to be on fucking duty right now?
Unfortunately, instead of a quick side trip to the Game world center, I had to go clothes shopping with the queen of the universe. Groaning, I grimaced in boredom as I had to follow Taylor inside an expensive clothes boutique.
I hate life, I really do.
In spite of the distractions in my head, the nagging feeling to alert myself as discreet as possible had never left. I looked on the surroundings. There were no other customers yet, which was good.
“Good morning, Gentlemen! How may I help you?” A brunette sales lady with pink painted lips asked with exaggerated enthusiasm.
Could this day become better at all?
I guessed not.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Taylor:
The entire morning was a inner fight with myself. Even though I had decided to fight for Zachary's and my reconcilation, I became to have grave doubts.
Doubts that I wasn't only forcing him to stay with me, but bringing him into a life threatening situation, just because of favoring my own needs.
I really didn't want him to go, coz I didn't want to be alone and lose the last living part of my family, but I felt that my acting couldn't be right anyway. I wanted to find another way to my brother, but not through forcing him into a dangerous situation he didn't even want to be. I realized that it would only gain his hate towards me coz I was using him for my own needs.
What would our parents say when they would see me doing that?
How could I live with the guilt if anything happens to Zac, because of me who brought him into this situation?
I didn't even know how to live and face the guilt I caused already, but that would cap it all off.
I could never forgive me. I already ruined his life back then because of leaving him, I couldn't agree to take his life away on top of that.
It broke my already broken heart even more to speak out the words to him that he should leave me, but maybe it was the only way I could save his life. Twink Twink was my Stalker. It had nothing to do with Zachary. That strange person already killed my wife and my unborn baby, if he'd get to know that Blade was my younger brother maybe he'd want to kill him as well. I just couldn't risk that.
Probably, the last night was supposed to be a Goodbye between us. And that's why my inner instinct laid my hand in his to feel the imagination of us being brothers for a last time.
And it felt good. It felt nice to sleep not alone and have family around me. And I was thankful to Blade for letting me feel what I needed so badly in that moment. But that was only my imagination of dreams. In reality I was abusing my little brother to do the most cruel thing an older brother could do. I used him for my own needs and exposed him to danger without thinking. Since I've seen that creepy person in the surveillance video, I was haunted by fear. I've seen with my own eyes how insane that person was. And I couldn't deliver Zachary to a such a sick Freak and hide behind him on top of that.
It wasn't right.
What kind of older brother would I be if I'd allow that?
I wasn't allowed to take my own needs over exposing him into a life threatening situation, no matter how much I wished that we would be a family again.
I knew that it was only my heart and my fear of being alone again which stopped me to say what I should have spoken out already. I just didn't want a goodbye that quick. A voice of reason, I forgot I had.
Sure, I would lie if I didn't admit that also my ego complex that my little brother was protecting me grew on me with Zac's presence on top of that. I felt pathetic and ashamed every time I thought about it that I was my little brother's dependent client. And maybe I would never get rid off that embarrassing feeling.
But that wasn't the reason why I wanted to release him. I wanted to keep my brother if only I could and try to live with it somehow. The reason was Zachary's security. His life which I wasn't allowed to ruin again.
I didn't want him to think that I release him because of my ego. After my panic attack this morning I realized that I had problems with the imagination to be suddenly alone again.
I was so scared to be alone. Not only because of my Stalker, but also because of the final loss of my last living relative.
But I wasn't allowed to use Zachary as my protective shield. I knew that he was waiting for my apologize about what I did to him and Mam and Dad which I owed him for so long. And I wished from all my heart that I could let him stay with me until I would have found the strength to talk about their death and my guilt about it, but Zac's security was more important for me than to prolong this dangerous situation for him.
With the realization how serious my situation was, I knew that there was no other way than to let him go as soon as possible.
I knew that it would be a goodbye forever.
I didn't want to lose Zachary. I didn't want to lose Blade. But I had to.
I had to lose him today to save his life...
previous Chapter 36 next Chapter 38
Chapter Overview: Link
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2014-04-22 12:04 pm (UTC)I wish for them to stay together so bad! And I hope for Blade finding a heart for Taylor. It would be so sad if they separate again without having talked.
The pictures are impressive once again, not only the banner, but also Taylor's expression in the second picture is just perfect.
Anxiously waiting for another Chapter!
no subject
Date: 2014-04-22 05:52 pm (UTC)I'm curious about his plan, I hope for him to keep Blade!